First off, I want to extend my condolences for your wife and what she must be going through right now.
Second of all...I am sorry, but I disagree with your thoughts on the 'funeral.'
Let me explain. If it were a funeral where the person was 'intact', as in...not cremated, I can understand having the funeral soon since decomposition prevents an extended period of time to bury the body.
I see where it is convenient to make the witnesses seem uncaring, but my experience outside the Borg tells me that this is not unusual.